The Unemployment Guide: Top 5 Tips for Staying Sane

How's your job hunt going? That good, eh? Me too. After a few months of searching and competing against countless candidates for each viable opportunity, it's hard not to feel like giving in and crawling under a rock.

Just when you need to look your best, exude confidence, and present yourself as the winner you are, you find you're sick of talking about yourself (blah, blah, blah), numb from keeping your game face on, and so stressed about money that you know it's affecting your brain. Not a good combination.

If unemployment is taking its toll on you, have courage. These Top 5 Unemployment Survival Tips can help you deal with the stress of the pink slip. Plus, check out my score for how I’ve managed to incorporate these tips into my own job search coping strategies.

1. Find the best way to manage your stress—and do it now.
Stress is at the bottom of this whole mess. It throws everything off—from sleep to weight control, hormone levels to appetite, mood, and more.

Before your adrenal glands become chicken fried nuggets, you need to get control over your cortisol level. Cortisol is a hormone that preps your body for the "fight or flight" response. Stress causes your cortisol level to rise, and as your body goes into "survival" mode, your sleep and eating habits take a major hit. Ten thousand years ago this would have been great if you were being chased by a saber-toothed tiger, but you're probably in your bathrobe banging out resumes right now. Come to think of it, the job search really is a beast. Tame it.

Fear of financial ruin is a major stress inducer. Think of your stress level as one big nasty feedback loop:

Lose job causes increased stress causes cortisol surge, which causes sleeplessness which then causes a craving sweets for fast energy, which can cause you to feel panicky and anxious, which causes more stress. Repeat.

So, how can you break this loop? That all depends on you. While going to yoga class might be a perfect solution for some, that doesn't mean it's the fix for you. What relaxes you? Gives you peace of mind? Building good stress-relieving habits takes time and practice. I know—I'm still working on mine.

MY SCORE: On a scale of 1-5 (5 being the best), I'd give myself a 3. Some days, instead of getting to the gym, I substitute high-octane chocolate and watch Law & Order for an hour. ..or more. Oh well. It's organic chocolate! I did just complete Bikini Boot Camp at my gym, though. I have to admit that getting your butt kicked by a trainer really helps, because you’re just too exhausted to worry.

2. Get some rest
According to Hyland's, a 105-year-old homeopathic pharmacy in Los Angeles, and in keeping with findings from the National Sleep Foundation, your financial woes are the culprit keeping you up at night, especially if you're unemployed. If you're really having a hard time getting to sleep, or staying asleep, you should see your doctor. Medication can help, as does exercise, regular bedtime, relaxation techniques, and keeping your doses of caffeine low. Naps can also help—so take one if you score less than six hours of sleep each night. It's not going to cause you to be less sleepy at bedtime and it can help keep your cortisol monster from coming out to play.

MY SCORE: 2.5. Ouch. I'm a born worrier, so this is a real toughie for me. But, I've recently found that taking a warm aromatherapy bath before bed and reading a really boring book for a few minutes really helps. Which book is it? It's the one I've tried to read for years and never make it past the first few pages. Everyone has a book that falls into this category—break it out and bask in the zzz's.

3. Professional help...get shrink-wrapped
Unemployment can seriously ding the self image of even the most confident person. Keeping morale high is difficult. If you feel depressed, get some help. In fact, your doctor can help you discover if what you're feeling is actually depression (and not just the basic blues). You may need medication to manage depression (if just for a little while, your depression is probably situational) or counseling—even a combination of both. Unemployment is distressing. It's not a secret, so don't be embarrassed.

And, don't go it alone on your job search either! Get those search engines, recruiters, networking groups (online and off) cranked up to high gear. I like TheLadders.com, Indeed.com, SimplyHired.com, Craigslist.com, Monster.com, CareerBuilder.com, Dice.com, kForce.com, SoloGigs.com, SnagAJob.com and the list goes on. Google your occupation and you'll find job search engines and sites specific to your industry. And, don't forget the federal government: Believe it or not, they're hiring.

MY SCORE: A 4. I did see a counselor and it was an excellent reality check. I just didn’t feel like myself. When I asked her if I felt "depressed because I was unemployed, the economy sucks, and I could run out of money and not be able to support myself and my kids," she chuckled and replied, "Gee...ya think?" I was feeling sucky because things are actually sucky. At least I'm not imagining it. We talked about some coping strategies, which I do indeed use, and we talked about how the feeling is also temporary. Based on my past experience, skills, and job history, I know I will eventually get a job. It's scary, but it has forced me to widen my search criteria and new opportunities that I may not have previously considered are surfacing.

4. Ditch the Doritos and (some) of the chocolate
Are you an emotional eater in times of stress? Again the stress-cortisol relationship is the culprit. Your body is in survival mode and is trying to help you flee the saber toothed tiger. Remember the major food groups are not salt, fat, and sugar. You can do a lot of damage here simply by overindulging. Eating fistfuls of sugar might taste yummy for the moment, but all you're doing is perpetuating that nasty feedback loop. Stop it and get a grip. This isn't ten thousand years ago. Don't despair: moderation, not deprivation, is the key. You're already deprived (of a job), so don't make it worse. Play good cop-bad cop with yourself. Good cop says it's OK to have a human-sized portion of chips or chocolate each day. Bad cop knows you’re on the edge and helps by swapping in healthy substitutions (fruit and granola for sugar, high fiber crackers with a schmere of Nutella or low-fat cheese for carbs, a teaser-sized bag of Doritos for salt, high-octane organic chocolate for "over-the-counter chocolate") and by putting those maniacal party-sized bags of crap high up on the top shelves of your kitchen cabinets.

MY SCORE: 4.5. This is pure will-power. Luckily, my eating habits weren't too horrendous before I was laid-off, but my weaknesses are definitely chips and chocolate. So, I made a few self-imposed rules. I allow myself two small squares of 70% organic chocolate each day. And, on Fridays I have "some" Doritos or my nemesis, salt-n-vinegar potato chips. By "some" I mean whatever I can fit in a cereal bowl. Do not, under any circumstances, eat out of the bag. Oh—I just discovered chocolate dipped potato chips. Genius invention. Kills two cravings with one stone.

5. Get some friends
All that networking you should be doing online and off doesn't replace getting together regularly with your pals. In an informal survey of stressed-out jobless folks I know, the most oft-cited "stress buster" is time spent with friends. Pick up the phone, grab a coffee, join a networking group, meet for lunch or a grab glass of wine. Socializing is scientifically proven to lower your stress level.

MY SCORE: 1.5. Sad, I know. This one is actually hardest for me. A job search can be very isolating. I'm kind of a quiet, introspective person, so when I’m stressed out, I tend to make things worse by further isolating myself (while I stew over and analyze the myriad ways my life sucks). But, I recently banded together with a group of unemployed parents from my kids' school. It's awesome, and, though I can’t make every meeting, the emails fly back and forth and the communication is really motivating. You just feel less alone. I've also made an extra effort to have dinner or lunch with friends. These are recent efforts on my part and I'll I can say is that I should have done them sooner, hence my low score.

Bonus tip: Stay busy
This might seem obvious, as you're probably very busy with your job search and your family or home life. But, remember that very old saying, "Idle hands make for idle minds." You need an activity that is not related to your job search. Nobody can conduct their job search 24/7, so pick up an old hobby.

MY SCORE: 5. I made 12 pot holders last month using the pot holder kit I got my daughter for Christmas. I've also started listening to books on CD while I’m in the car. My recent favorite is the CD edition of David McCullough's John Adams. It's fascinating and motivating.

As they say, misery loves company, so here are a few sage ideas from a few other current job seekers I know:

Tracie: Get to the gym. Limit your job search. Write interesting cover letters. Go back to your idealistic 20s and remember what used to really motivate you. Make being frugal fun. Get in all those doctor visits you’ve procrastinated about for so long!

Marc: Get on relevant alumni lists or comb through your Alma Mater's alumni website.

Betsy: Listen to a motivational CD, such as The Power of Intention. Spend a little money on yourself—get a mini manicure or pedicure, or a 5-minute chair massage. Engage in a non-job-related activity each day, such as a hobby or project. Volunteer some of your time to help family and friends. Make it personal. Got a friend who collects antique model cars? Send them a link to an article of interest to their hobby.

What's your stress-busting score? Hang in there!

Copyright 2009 Shoestring, LLC. Photo: iStock